As a follow-up to my "You Might be a New York Yankee if ..." list (as read on
WEEI's Dennis and Callahan show), here is a new Top 10 list that you might enjoy.
You Might Be A Montreal Expo if ...
You Might Be A New York Yankee if ... (Inspired by the "You might be a Yankee if..." list)
- When people call your ticket office and ask what time the game starts, they reply "What time can you be here?"
- You have a 155 kilometer per hour fastball
- The vendors at your park sell escargot on a croissant instead of hot dogs
- Your entire team earns less than all but six New York Yankees
- You have been traded for Pedro Martinez, Randy Johnson, John Wetteland, Moises Alou or Andres Galarraga
- No one knows what the hell your logo is supposed to be
- The local hockey team outdraws you for an intrasquad scrimmage
- You pay $4 million in taxes on your $5 million salary
- Your bleachers smell like beer AND donuts
- Your team's only retired jersey is the mascot's "!"
- Your DH is also your drug dealer
- You find Mariah Carey in your locker
- You need a ten-year-old with a glove to win the World Series for you
- You've been hired and fired by the same employer five times
- You wake up in a cold sweat hearing airplanes (sorry, that's You Might be a New York Met if...)
- You did not play in the New York Yankee farm system
- You see your boss all week, plus Thursdays at 9:00 on NBC
- A large beam suddenly falls on your head
- You have exposed more than your windup in the bullpen
- You've been beaten by Sipowicz